17 June 2008
How can I been so serenely happy when I take everything so seriously? I know the question has crossed a few minds. And I realize that I may seem too serious- to the point of being depressing. So what does Ryan do for fun? Is it ok to take a break and have fun in the midst of a warzone? Why not?
Today I stole up to our roof where we have a little sun deck. Got a little sun on this pale body, and listened to A.J. Pearson (Sergeant, our crewchief) play me some tunes on his guitar. In the old days, I would have busted out my guitar, but I’ve learned that it usually leads to a subtle competition of outplaying the other person. I decided to just sit and enjoy his songs. We like a lot of the same music.
I’m self conscious because I expect someone to come up and bark and order to grab my rifle and go man a guard tower. Not very realistic in this day, with my rank and job, but it’s what has been subliminally programmed into me.
It’s been busy the last couple days. Moving out to a new site and getting settled in for the long haul. Our MEDEVAC crew got rotated out to a remote post near the Pakistan border to cut the response time down to some of these outlying areas. It will be a while before we get back to ‘civilization’ but I’m enjoying being away from the flagpole, the constant meetings and phone calls bearing meaningless tasks and impossible suspenses. Out here, it’s just our one crew, one helicopter and one mission. Everything else goes away. Really makes one think about his future as a captain with the looming prospects of staff and command. But that’s a story for another day…